Victoriana Cockblock

With a starting bid of $1500, this anti-masturbation contraption from the 1880s could be yours thanks to the vagaries of eBay. Back in the day, when everyone thought like Mitt Romney, folks were so afraid of "wet dreams" that they strapped metal torture devices to their sons' bits and pieces. At least they were thoughtful enough to perforate the, um, "bits" part so as to permit what must have been a ghastly exchange of moisture. Can you imagine copper oxidizing slowly against your swimsuit area, growing green and pocky as it corrodes? I can:

EXTREMELY RARE ANTI MASTURBATION DEVICE DATING FROM c1880. THE COPPER SHAPED DEVICE WAS ATTACHED TO A BELT AND WORN BY BOYS AS A MEANS OF PREVENTING NOCTURNAL EMISSIONS. VERY MUCH AN INDICATION OF SOCIETIES VIEWS ON ONANISM IN THE 19TH CENTURY. THIS IS THE FIRST EXAMPLE WE HAVE OFFERED FOR SALE IN 24 YEARS. THE CONDITION IS EXCELLENT 3 ½ INCHES TOP TO BASE.

Not to be a dick butthead, but am I the only one who looks on the taint hoop and things "wedgie?"

[via BoingBoing]