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Retrophilia: Electric Future

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retrophilia (ret troh FEE lee uh) n. 1 An intense attraction for things of the past. 2 a weekly series for popsucker wherin the irrepressible Wootini reveals the horrors of the past to the present to avoid making the same mistakes in the future.

What is this? A boy making a snowman while another watches from inside wearing a swimsuit next to a pool? Is swimsuit boy trapped inside of a plastic bubble, unable to enjoy the real world? Or is it some kind of dimensional gateway allowing people from different parts of the world to coexist? Okay, no, it's not that crazy, but it's still kind of insane when you actually read the ad! Make the jump and see!

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That's right, "future homes will be able to face in any direction -- turned at will by your electricity." And your whim, I would think. I love the idea that you could flip a switch and your house would rotate so the morning sunlight wouldn't come in through your bedroom windows. And it also looks like the artist here was clever enough to realize that this round house needs to have large sliding glass doors every few feet along the outside so that no matter how you turn the building, it'll always have a way to get out to the "electrically operated climate-conditioned" extension that allows for "'summer terraces' all year round -- enjoy winter and summer fun both at once." Awesome. So while little Jimmy is freezing his butt off making a snowman outside, his brother stays inside with mom and dad enjoying a dip in the heated swimming pool. Well, sort of -- you'll notice that while dad's relaxing in the water, Mom's hard at the gardening. And I bet she's got a roast in the oven, too. It never ends!

This was an ad from America's Independent Electric Light and Power Companies, explaining how they were doubling the electric supply by building two billion dollars worth of power plants and power lines a year. And the reason for all this expansion? Why, so they could outfit your home with all the latest electrical wizardry... well, by 1960's standards, at any rate. Meaning, crazy, science-fiction ideas that would never come to pass...

The one about how "in the future" you'll be able to raise and lower tables and work surfaces with the flip of a switch isn't too far off the mark, although that's not exactly something people have in their kitchens or anything. I'm also curious how electricity was supposed to "bring beds out of the walls in the evening -- then 'make' them and fold them into the walls in the morning." How exactly would it "make" the bed? Did they think little robot arms would pop out of the wall and pull the sheets back into place like it was the Jetsons or something? But honestly, believing that "the power that controls your home climate will even do the dusting" was never going to happen. Automatic dusters? Now we're really in Jetsons territory.

That said, I would totally want one of these rotating houses with the summertime back porch. Especially if the beds made themselves and there were automatic dusters! (I'm a lazy cuss!)

2 Comments

Eshto said:

That's why they put "make" in quotes, they were hedging their bets. They were pretty certain about the rotating house, but just in case bed-making robot arms wouldn't be invented yet...

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