That's right, folks -- styrofoam! (which is a trademark of Dow Chemical Co., so don't get any bright ideas!) It's a whole series of kits that will help you to create charming homemade Christmas decorations "for FUN and PROFIT." I don't know. It might be fun to make these, but how much profit are you really going to make on them? You buy an "angel kit" for $2.98, but what can you sell the actual angel for? If it looks anything like the one pictured, probably no more than $2.98!

Although it's not as bad as the "lantern kit" which looks like it requires more glitter than is probably safe for humans to come in contact with. "Conversation piece" indeed. And that conversation is: What the hell is this supposed to be? Why is there glitter all over the house?

Still, it's not as bad as the "wreath kit." Ew. "One of the prettiest decorations you've ever seen?" Yeah, I'm gonna have to disagree with you on that one. It looks like a whole bunch of rotting blueberries strung together in a black ring of death. Not particularly festive. Unless you're Satan. But I'm guessing he probably doesn't celebrate Christmas. Just a feeling I get.

And don't forget, with each order, you get a free booklet full of "do it yourself" Christmas decorations full of the "prettiest most unusual STYROFOAM and trim decorations ever." So don't delay, start crafting some family heirlooms out of styrofoam today! I mean, come on -- you all know your family has some of these kind of things. And they were probably made back in the sixties, too! There's nothing better for making heirlooms than a chemical substance that won't bio-degrade! It's fun!