Retrophilia: That's Just Wrong
retrophilia (ret troh FEE lee uh) n. 1 An intense attraction for things of the past. 2 a weekly series for popsucker wherin the irrepressible Wootini reveals the horrors of the past to the present to avoid making the same mistakes in the future.
You may look at this small little thumbnail image and wonder, what's that next to that guy's head? It sort of looks like a sock, but that can't be... can it? Oh, you have no idea. This ad is so insane that I can't even believe it made it out into the world. Go on — make the jump and you'll see for yourself! Yikes!
(And apologies in advance for the quality of the image. This came straight from the recesses of the interwebs and not my personal collection. But thanks to Christian for the tip off!)
I mean... I can't... It's just so...
Right?
I do appreciate this guy politely folding his hands across his butthole to save us from that potential embarrassment. But I think the absolute best part of this whole ad isn't the whole contortionist thing intimating that if you can... um, pleasure yourself orally out of a suit, you can do it in their 100% Dacron polyester suit (which doesn't seem right because obviously wearing clothes would be somewhat of an obstacle), but the first line of the ad copy that says "Cricketeer has come out." Well, duh!
Honestly, there's no reason for the indent on those paragraphs to be quite so severe. Someone in the ad department was totally having a laugh with that one.
And I'm not really sure that birthday suits are "wrinkle resistant." As the years go by, mine seems to have given up the fight and isn't resisting too much anymore, if you know what I mean!
I do, however, take issue with their claim that the Cricketeer knit suit is "easier to wear" than a birthday suit. All those buttons? Totally not as easy. And how exactly is it easier to pay for? My birthday suit came free. I don't know about theirs...
Wootini
Posted to Hot Stuff, Retrophilia on 22 June 2009
· Comments (1)
Other stuff like this: advertisement, cricketeer, retrophilia, seventies, suit
This is probably the only time he's used his talent for something he won't be ashamed of later. Oh, hell he'll be ashamed of this too.