Retrophilia: Quit It!
retrophilia (ret troh FEE lee uh) n. 1 An intense attraction for things of the past. 2 a weekly series for popsucker wherin the irrepressible Wootini reveals the horrors of the past to the present to avoid making the same mistakes in the future.
That's right, this kid wants you. No, not to join the Army. Not even to join the Kiss Army. No, this ad, which ran in Defenders #85 in May of 1981 wants you to do something completely different.
And don't even try guessing. Just make the jump. You won't get it in a million years!
Yeah, for just $2.95, you can help your parents stop smoking! Come on, that's barely three measly dollars. Oh, well, once you add the 30 cents postage and handling, well, then yeah, it's over three dollars. But still! You can stop your parents from smoking and giving themselves lung cancer! (If they haven't already)
Of course, I'm guessing the parents would much rather have nicotine patches than whatever silly little stickers these people want kids to plaster up all over their house. Like Mrs. Phyllis Bocian, 36, really came home and found stickers all over her house and started crying? Probably did, since these things probably leave that annoying gummy residue all over the wallpaper!
It's curious that they don't even give one single example of their clever little stickers, which will apparently make your parents laugh and then quit smoking. It's that easy!
At least they offer you a money-back guarantee so when you parents throw you a beating for ruining the wallpaper, you can at least get your $3.35 back! Back then, that was good for a whole stack of comic books!
Wootini
Posted to Hot Stuff, Retrophilia on 22 February 2010
· Comments (1)
Other stuff like this: advertisement, anti-smoking, eighties, retrophilia, stickers
re: "It's curious that they don't even give one single example of their clever little stickers..."
I definitely saw this ad, definitely bought The Defenders long after the wonder that was Steve Gerber no longer wrote (or, should I say, directed) the title.
I guess I thought, when I read my copy of Defenders #81, that the pic of the boy with the accusing finger was an example of one of the stickers.
Does anyone know? Would anyone who ordered them care to tell us?